Film Reviews

Hitman is yet another example revealing that Hollywood has no idea of what video gamers want out of a film adaptation. It's no secret that movies based on video games are typically hollow and nonsensical, especially with the likes of Uwe Boll running around, but sometimes, it just boggles the mind. I wish directors and producers would take a step back and ask themselves, "If this were just an original movie based on nothing, would it still make sense and would it still be enjoyable?" The answer here is "no." Regrettably, even if you're familiar with the source material, the answer is still "no." Let's forget about the video game for a moment and try to tackle Hitman the movie. The protagonist is a super assassin codenamed Agent 47 (Timothy Olyphant). He's part of a mysterious group called the Organization that breeds a bunch of bald-headed super assassins, easily identified by the barcode on the back of their skulls. There appears to be some religious ties as well, but beyond the quick childhood shots in the beginning, we don't get much background on our hero. He gets his orders through his laptop, but why he does what he does or what the motives of his Organization are is a mystery. 47 is pursued by Interpol Agent Mike Whittier (Dougray Scott) who's been chasing him for several years. Everything's going fine for 47 until one of his marks amazingly comes back from the dead and the Organization starts hunting 47.